Prick With A Fork

I’ve just ordered my copy of Adam Gopnik’s The Table Comes First, and from the sounds of this Kirk Leech review, I’ve got something to look forward to, namely, an eloquent swipe at the moral vanity of those middle class organo-loco-ecofoodie types who have taken all the joy out of food:

Eating is one of life’s most enjoyable sensations. It’s fun and life-enhancing. Yet today, the pleasure of eating is increasingly weighed down with anxiety. Eating, once a relatively uncomplicated activity for many of us, has become laden with ethical and moral meaning and which has been tasked with grandiose political purpose.

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A proper Reuben, Sydney-style.

So fans of this site (both of you) will be well familiar with my ongoing quest for the perfect Reuben sandwich, which has been thwarted at every turn by parvenu Brits and others who wouldn’t know a New York deli sandwich if it bit them.

Well, the quest — for the moment — appears to be over, and we now have a front-runner in ReubenQuest 2012: Spilling the Beans Cafe on Clarence Street in the CBD.

I went in the other day on a tip from a commenter, and here’s what I got:

A proper Reuben. Thick slabs of corned beef (honestly, they could have been thinner, but they were oh-so-tender). Sauerkraut. Proper Russian dressing. Great rye bread.

Not quite the Carnegie Deli, but pretty close. Well done.

For all the complaints that it is a hotbed of right-wingery, News Ltd’s opinion site The Punch certainly packs in the lefties. Here’s union hack Tara Moriarty indulging in economic illiteracy as she defends the night and weekend penalty rates that are crippling many restaurants:

But more importantly, white-collar workers are getting paid penalty rates. If you’re pulling down substantially more than the minimum wage then that is your penalty rate.

Right-o, then. I had my say on the issue recently here.

UPDATE: Tara Moriarty is a real supporter of those on the lowest rungs of society … like problem gamblers:

A SENIOR ALP official has called on independent crossbencher Andrew Wilkie to abandon his timetable for poker machine reform, in the first sign of internal party unrest over Julia Gillard’s power deal with the Tasmanian MP.

The liquor and hospitality workers union United Voice NSW secretary Tara Moriarty, who sits on the ALP national executive and is a vice-president of the NSW branch of the party, has warned Mr Wilkie that tens of thousands of jobs will be threatened by the push for mandatory pre-commitment on poker machines, and called on him to reconsider his timetable.

Ms Moriarty, a rising figure of the Labor Right, has foreshadowed taking her concerns to the Prime Minister if Mr Wilkie refuses to compromise, setting the scene for a potential internal push from the NSW Right faction to scuttle the poker machine reforms. “We would be campaigning heavily on this issue if it looked like it was going to become law,” Ms Moriarty said.

OMG! Paula Deen’s been caught – the journo’s words, not mine – eating … wait for it … a cheeseburger. On a cruise ship. The horror.

Not only that, witnesses said the diabetes sufferer was “woolfing” it down.

Mitch Hedberg once observed that “Alcoholism is a disease, but it’s the only one you can get yelled at for having”, but I think we may just have to add diabetes to the list.

In the meantime, Deen’s got more trouble on her plate now that she has diabetes.

New York Nanny Mike Bloomberg just might cut her legs off.

And Wilford Brimley’s definitely gonna kick her ass.

UPDATE: Iowahawk sums it up.

So the Spectator Australia folk have finally put up a link to my piece suggesting that we ditch award wages in the restaurant industry and get servers hustling for tips instead:

Here I propose an experiment: very simply, the restaurant award should become optional. Under the terms of the test, restaurants could either pay their staff as directed by the government, or they could pay minimum wage and let tips make up the rest. To keep it fair, those working for restaurants still on the award would not be allowed to put so much as a tip jar next to the cash register, while establishments that had gone off the award would have to publicise that as well (including by pointing out their lower prices).

Were this to go forward, I predict three things would happen. Number one, the quality of service and price of food at non-award restaurants across Australia would improve substantially in the diner’s favour. Number two, the take-home earnings of those who were tipped — and systems would have to be in place to share out the tips beyond those working front-of-house — would increase. (When I was at university in Washington, DC, a friend worked weekends as a waiter at a local steakhouse and would come home with nearly $1,000 each night.) And finally, unions would do everything in their power to make life difficult for the non-award restaurants and their patrons and shut down the whole experiment.

Read the whole thing, as they say.

…for the lack of activity in these parts. The weirdly abbreviated holiday week in Australia, plus an avalanche of paid work, has me still figuring out how to work writing into the schedule. To paraphrase Oscar Wilde, work is the curse of the blogging classes.

The Prick With a Fork was on the road yesterday, in search of subject matter for this site’s inaugural review.

Any guesses where we wound up?